Just writing

I am feeling a little scared right now so I wanted to put some things down. I have avoided watching, reading, or listening to the news since Richard left, but for some reason I found myself reading the news portion of yahoo tonight. The thing that stands out in my mind is "5 troops killed in northern Iraq". Well needless to say I am now restless and worried. I just heard from him this morning, but I know he won't call me again for a few days if not longer. The units involved were not released of course so now I sit an wait to see if someone is going to knock on my door. This is why I have avoided the news for the last few months. If I don't I sit and worry. I have been thinking about him so much lately and every time I do I say an extra prayer for him to return to us yet I am still don't feel better. I am ready for the whole thing to be over and him to return, yet I know he loves his job and is doing everything he can to return to his family. Of course that will only get me so far. I am having a harder time this tour. I am not sure if it is I am now left with 2 children or that I am just older and more aware of everything. Maybe it is because I don't have very many good friends around to talk to that are going through the same thing. I know it does not help that everyone in our cul-de-sac has their soldier home with them now so we get to see all the families together. I just want to cry. Maybe that would be a good thing right now. Have myself a good cry and feel better. I just don't know. I need to start trusting that whatever the Lord has planned for me, He will help me through and will only give me what He knows I can handle. Yet too many days I don't do that. I want my husband here with us, not with Him or anywhere else! I think I will have to say a lot of extra prayers tonight for the families of those troops that they might get through this ordeal. Having put this all down I feel a little better, but I am still very nervous and scared. I ask that you send out some prayers for the soldiers and their families left behind that those we are close to return safely to us.

Thank you for your support. We love you all.
Naomi